Jager Bomb with a Hammer

This was a trick I decided to adapt for a small party I was throwing. These days, every cocktail enthusiast and their grandfather has a spherical ice mold. I saw a trend for hollowing them out and serving a cocktail inside the ice sphere. I just did my own variation.

You only need a little equipment for this. You'll need a freezer, naturally. You'll also need a heat source and a metal point to heat, though a soldering iron does the job brilliantly, provided it's clean. You'll also need a small funnel, though a syringe or meat injector works a bit faster, and when dealing with ice, speed is critical. Lastly, you'll need a spherical ice ball mold that you can flip upside down and remain stable. I prefer the style pictured. The only other things required are the liquids, Jagermeister, and Red Bull. 

The basic premise is that ice freezes from the outside in. The trick is just stopping it before it freezes too much. Fill your ice ball mold with water, add the top half, and put it in the freezer. After an hour and a half, flip the mold over. This allows the ball to freeze evenly as different parts of the freezers have different temperatures. Also, any air bubbles and impurities would float or sink, throwing off the thermal conductivity. Otherwise, slices of the ball would be fragile and others very thick. After another hour and a half, remove the partially frozen ice ball. Bear in mind that these times are relative to what I find to be the average home freezer. You may need to extend the time.

Rinse the outside of the mold with warm water, not hot, or you may crack the ice. Now, we need to hollow out the mold. Heat an ice pick or use a soldering iron to poke a hole in the top of the ice ball. Draining can be a tricky part. You can flip the ball over and drain it out, but it will take ages because of the lack of airflow. Using a meat injector seems to be the fastest way of sucking out most of the liquid. You can also use a straw and blow sharply into the ball to eject a good portion of the ball's water while it's upside down to drain it much faster. However, this technique isn't suited to a bar environment. 

Next, using a funnel or the meat injector, fill the ball with Jagermeister. Plug the hole with something that allows the ball to stay upright. A cherry with a pick through it works well, as could a coiled citrus twist. Add the ball to a large rocks glass and fill the glass with Red Bull. Serve with a small hammer to let the guest smash the ball open.

My Ideal Meal

This was an interesting thought experiment I posed to myself. What would my ideal meal be if money, materials, and time were no object? My birthday is coming soon at the time of writing this post and I was wondering what I'd like to do for it. A nice hearty dinner has always been a tradition, but if I could have anything, from any restaurant, for any number of courses, along with any drink pairings, what would I want? To be clear, these are all items I've enjoyed individually in the past, though not necessarily together. While these are not all my favorite foods specifically, they are foods that hold some significance or nostalgia to me. I hope you enjoy it. What would you do for your greatest meal ever?

Drink 1: Americano

This is my staple before meal drink. It's light. It opens my palate. It won't compete with other flavors and it's one where I can sip it at any speed I like and on a hot day, it is truly refreshing. This drink was the first drink ever ordered by James Bond in Ian Flemming's novel, Casino Royale. I adore Campari so I knew I'd need that in my first drink as it is an aperitif. For the vermouth, I would prefer Vya, a new, Californian made, line of Vermouth. I might take it with regular soda, but I would prefer it with Perrier. It is worth mentioning that during the entire meal I would like a side of ice water. 

Appetizer: Cheese and Meat Plate

To follow up with the last bits of my cocktail, I would like to consume an array of cured meats and fine cheeses. I know I would require some prosciutto, ideally thin-sliced prosciutto de parma. Some of the meats must be a bit spiced, some properly made pepperoni, salami, or bologna. One of the greatest slices I've eaten recently was actually of duck prosciutto so I'd like a few slices of that, but not too many as it's quite rich. I'd like a bit of Roquefort, sheep's blue cheese, but again not too much. In contrast, I believe that some smoked brie or Pierre Robert would be in order. We may as well throw in some goat's milk cheese as well, some bucheron perhaps. Naturally, there would be a few other compliments such as candied walnuts and spicy stone mustard, along with bread, oil, and jam.

Drink 2 and 3: Sazerac & Fruh Kolsch

As I move from lighter flavors of cheese to some stronger flavors I opted for my ultimate favorite cocktail and a good all day drinking beer. Yes, a bit of double fisting here, but I would be sitting and having water as well. The Sazerac is really a favorite cocktail if I know I have a competent bartender tending to me. It's supposedly the first cocktail truly invented in the United States though there is much dispute over this. The original recipe supposedly called for cognac, and then started being cut with rye, until eventually it just became a rye whiskey cocktail, which is how I like it. I like Dad's Hat Rye with Grande Absente for the rinse. 

Fruh holds a special place in my heart as the first drink I ever had technically legally. Sorry, Herr Goetz but I had a few beers when I was on the school exchange in Germany. It was in violation of the school regulations, but it was worth it. A group of us students went out with the German students to Rhein Park and we drank. We got a case of Fruh and of something else, Spaten or Becks. I'd had plenty of beer before, even wine, and a few liquors. But there was something about that beer that made me feel good. This was the first where I really felt like that there was nothing wrong with it. We didn't have to hide it from anybody. I looked for this beer everywhere when I came to be of age in the United States to no success. It is in no way the best beer I've ever had, but it's a simple true pleasure. One particularly bad day I found myself at a bar and they had Fruh on draft. As I was drinking that beer all the awful things that were happening fell away.

Entree: Surf and Turf with Potatoes and Mac 'n' Cheese
You can never go wrong with two premium pieces of meat. Steak is one of those things that pair well with the heartier cheeses and my new refreshments. One of my favorite meals at my old job was a 9-ounce steak cooking in its own bloody juices topped with a disk of melted soft cheese, I forget which one at this time and a few potato medallions cooked in what I recall being duck fat. Like Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction, I typically take my steak bloody as hell. To pay homage to the song of a dear friend, I think I'd have a porterhouse. Though I'd take it pan-roasted to medium rare with butter and light seasoning. A really wet steak would not be best paired with my other dishes and sides.

I have a long-standing love of lobster. I remember being a boy and cooking live lobsters with my parents. My cat would fight them and my father would try to recreate the scene from Naked Gun 2 1/2. I remember visiting Cape Cod in the summers as a child and eventually coming to love ripping apart and eating the messy treat. A bit of melted butter to pair with a split lobster tail and two big fat cracked claws is all I could ask for were it to be paired with a steak as well. I imagine a 2-pound lobster would suffice for this.

I debated a long time what side or sides I would want with this main course. Potatoes were what came so naturally, it was almost a cliche. Baked potatoes were never my style. Roast potatoes in duck fat would easily be my ideal, but I always like mashed potatoes too. So I decided to have both. A half dozen or so baby potatoes split and fried to give them a nice crisp snap. Naturally, a little salt and pepper, possibly rosemary.

The mashed potatoes would require some mix-ins. A bit of garlic and cheddar cheese should suffice, but butter, cream, and other light flavors would be welcome. A nice creamy feeling to wash the palate. I don't care for them overly lumpy or fluffy. a nice creamy texture is what makes it my comfort food. I thought of incorporating bacon to the potatoes, but I thought that better suited to some pasta, or better yet, some Mac 'n' Cheese.

I firmly believe that the best macaroni and cheese is baked with bread crumbs on top, forming a crust. Bacon pieces should be incorporated, not bacon bits, pan-cooked bacon sliced to about 3/4". Also, nice long noodles please, while elbows and shells promote nostalgic thoughts of mom making Kraft or Velveeta, I believe, in this case, comfort food serves the function of providing the comfort. Oddly enough the cheese sauce blend isn't a real concern for me in this dish though I would like it not to be over watery, and preferably to have a little spice to it, a little warmth.

Drink 4: Patron Burdeos
I thought a very long time about what my after-dinner drink should be. Ideally, my previous two would hold through my main course spread. I thought of whiskey, port, amaro, or even a boozy milkshake kind of drink. While whiskey was my style, I thought it better suited to leave that to pair with the steak and not to be with dessert. Then I thought of brandy. No, that wouldn't be for me. While I like it, I knew there was something better. Then it hit me, the most wonderful drink I was privileged enough to taste as a gift when I did my first cocktail showcase. Patron Burdeos had the taste of fruit and wine from it's wonderful aging in the Bordeaux wine barrels. When you mix that with the proof of a good tequila you get a drink a is is better than cognac at being brandy. A snifter of this neat would be fitting for the last drink of the evening.

Dessert: Lava Cake, Ice Cream, Berries 
I needed some chocolate for dessert, but also a little more creaminess other than just cheese and butter. Lava cake is a great go-to dessert because it's never bad, but when it's good, it's tremendous. If the cake has a good crunch to the shell that almost cracks allowing the hot lava to flow out, then you have yourself an amazing cake. You naturally need some cold to go with that. So some vanilla ice cream, you can't beat a cliche sometimes. A few chilled strawberries, and maybe a few raspberries

I thought of doing a whole spread of every kind of food imaginable, but I knew much of it wouldn't pair together. So I opted for the most luxurious cohesive spread I could. A meal that would remain uncluttered was a necessity. I wouldn't want a volcano sushi roll with some barbeque pulled pork and creme brulee. It just would mesh right on any level, though all of those things are amazing on their own.

I thought I'd price this were I to order it at a restaurant assuming average markup and prices. I'd actually estimate this at a little over $200, maybe $240. A good chunk of that comes from just the Burdeos. Were I to make this on my own, excluding cooking costs, it may only cost about $65 if I shopped the deals available to me. Of course, that is by the ounce for cocktails and may be considerably higher than that if you factor in the cost of whole bottles and containers. But I think this meal would be worth that. In practicality, I might switch the Burdeos for something more practical, but this thought experiment was for the ideal meal.

"The meal isn't over when I'm full. The meal is over when I hate myself"
- Louis C.K.

Photo Credit: Flickr, Wikimedia, Pixabay

Shakers

There are two main types of shakers used by bartenders across the globe. Each bears its own merits. Some are designed for aesthetics while others are designed for versatile use. 

The Boston Shaker

Supposedly the first concept of a shaker goes back to well before the common era to Central and South America where it was used to incorporate chocolate into a beverage. The Egyptians also used it to incorporate spices. The shaker as we know it today goes back to the late 1800s where an innkeeper noticed that two of his serving vessels nested together. In 1872, a device was actually patented to shake six drinks at once.

In America and many other countries, when you shake a drink, it's going to be in a Boston shaker. Especially in a high volume bar environment. The two pieces of a Boston shaker are very multi-purpose. Mixing glasses can be used as beer glasses or even collins glasses. Take a mixing tin, and insert it with the open end down over the mixing glass and give it a light smack to make a seal. Most bartenders find it easier to create a seal with the tin cocked to the side to create a flush seal between the glass and tin. This makes it easier to separate the two once shaken. Shake vigorously, horizontally, rather than up and down, for 8-10 seconds. to break the seal that has most likely tightened due to the ice shrinking the metal strike the side of the tin, at the rim, 90 degrees from where the two parts are flush. This should break the seal and allow the removal of the glass.

Variants of the glass on tin combination are very common. Many craft bartenders have opted to use smaller, 16 oz., cheater tins to make the seal rather than a mixing glass. this allows for a seal that can be gripped and maintained with one hand while shaking. This allows for the shaking of two drinks at once which is very handy at craft cocktail bars as they have become famous date venues. No one wants to stare at their drink waiting for their partner to get theirs, so two drinks at once allow for a proper toast. The French shaker may deserve its own category, but I regard it as a simple variant to the standard Boston shaker. The smaller tin is specially designed to create a perfect seal with the mixing tin and bows in to create a firm grip for the bartender. This also has the advantage of not having any glass that could break.

The Cobbler / Three Piece Shaker

The cobbler shaker has a similar design but with an added dedicated middle piece in the design. It dates back to 1884 as a modification to the Boston shaker which included a built-in strainer. One simply builds the drink in the bottom tin, adds the middle strainer piece to the top of the tin, and then adds the cap on top to create a full seal. Some people say that this incorporates less air into the drink and that when liquid gets trapped between the top two pieces it creates a less emulsified drink. I do find myself just naturally shaking these drinks longer to make sure it's well chilled. Personally, I really don't enjoy this style of the shaker as they often can become stuck together and impossible to separate. With a bit of training, I'm told this won't occur but I really don't see it as a time saver in the long run. There is still a separate strainer piece you need to clean and the pieces are far less versatile. These styles of strainers can look very impressive and ornate, but they really don't serve many functions, all things considered. 

"You can't buy happiness, but you can prepare a cocktail, and that's kind of the same thing."

Photo Credit: Wikimedia, Project Noun